Music Station 10

You and Me by Lifehouse

What day is it
And in what month
This clock never seemed so alive
I can’t keep up
And I can’t back down
I’ve been losing so much time

cause it’s you and me and all of the people
with nothing to do, nothing to lose
And it’s you and me and all of the people
And I don’t know why, I can’t keep my eyes off of you

All of the things that I want to say
Just aren’t coming out right
I’m tripping inwards
You got my head spinning
I don’t know where to go from here

Cause it’s you and me and all of the people
With nothing to do, nothing to prove
And it’s you and me and all of the people
And I don’t know why, I can’t keep my eyes off of you

There’s something about you now
I can’t quite figure out
Everything she does is beautiful
Everything she does is right

Cause it’s you and me and all of the people
With nothing to do, nothing to lose
And it’s you and me and all of the people
And I don’t know why, I can’t keep my eyes off of

You and me and all of the people
With nothing to do, nothing to prove
And it’s you and me and all of the people
And I don’t know why, I can’t keep my eyes off of you

What day is it
And in what month
This clock never seemed so alive

Revenge of The Mushroom

That is this particular day in my life where I was lying on the bench looking upon the beautiful evening sky but I know in my heart, no matter how beautiful an evening can be, the night will still fall. I feel that my heart always want to fly away from this place, leave the comfort zone and find somewhere to start all over again. There were reasons not to, but I don’t see it anymore. I think I’ll be leaving here soon. I never thought I am going to say this but here it goes, “I’m living on a jet plane”. Please don’t tell anyone especially her. Anyway, have you ever heard this song, “Living on a jet plane”, it’s a song by John Denver. It’s a song about a man about to leave his small town to the city. He told his lover how much he misses her and really wishes that she could wait for him. There, see, another issue about long distance relationship, it never works out. I am so sorry Mr. T, but look at the bright side, Sarah is still here with and for you. Please work out your long distance relationship. To the many nights you will enjoy to be million of miles away yet just a heartbeat away. I’ve got something for you.

I went for a job interview that day. The interviewee asked me a few questions like “why do you like malayisa?”, “if you are given any political power, what would you like to do?” and “what motivates you?”. I said I like Malaysia because of her peace and harmonious days, her food, her economical growth and her weather. I know it’s stupid but I really ran out of idea for the last one. I told him too that I would like to be the financial minister because I want to allocate more money for the poor and needy. He replied asking why wouldn’t I inject cash flow into middle class families because middle class family could finance money better and the returns are higher. I restate by saying the money should be allocated for education funds. Think about it, I met people that are not so rich but quite smart, never had the chance to study what they really want because they couldn’t afford, political system in M’sia or never knew they have the chance. Learning and able to teach someone else motivates me to learn. For example, we study something stupid call Biology, memorizing just can’t work for the brain of hanjun. I’m so not motivated to study Biology. Anyway, really hope I get the job.

As I was being interviewed, my uncle was talking to the manager of Potter Farrelly & Associates. He is graduate from London School Economics. Oh, how much I wish I could go to London. They were talking about nowadays standard of local universities are so bad. Sometimes, people always look down at local universities. Some even say, if you want to do actuarial science locally, better not do at all. Did you know I was offered into Mallaca Community College? I have no idea how I got it but do you know I just need 2 credits to enter? What kind of kanasai is that? Our educational system is so poor. Even when I got my SPM result, it’s not I regret didn’t get straight As but more of being embarrassed because our educational standard is so low. Politics again. Our government set up too many universities and college. Their standard is poor and the graduates are not so good. Nowadays, you go out the street, you see millions of graduates. People in Malaysia are not hungry enough, people in India and China are waiting for your job at a much lower pay. So, work hard and don’t demand too much.

Speaking about China, the milk dairy products issue is the biggest issue of the month. The cause of all these trouble is some idiotic chinese inside people who took bribe. Corruption and greed are still the weaknesses of chinese people after 500 years. It’s in our blood to be like that. 500 years ago, during the Manchurian Dynasty, some corrupted ministers allowed the entry of opium to China which was one of the many tricks to fool the chinese. Drug the army and attack china. The British attacked china and most of the armies are high and where got semangat to got to war. Then, they lost Hong Kong to the British. It’s written in history that chinese people always fall into corruption and if corruption can tear away a once so mighty kingdom, it can destroy anything powerful we once have. Please don’t fall into this. Not only you kill yourself, a lot of innocent people out there are suffering too.

I went to akil’s house recently, he embarrassed me completely and I lost my ground as usual. We played pool at his house. To be honest, I really suck at playing pool. I hope my father would buy a pool table and set it up in our house. I know he wants one but don’t really have the chance to buy one. Akil is doing great and I hope he always does. He always come out with stupid ideas and crazy thoughts. No akil, no way I am going to follow your stupid marriage plan. It’s crazy la. To happiness that will always flow into your life. People might ask me whether which one would I prefer, going to overseas to study and say, being with someone and stuck in malaysia? I think I would stay back. People might say going overseas in a once in a lifetime but hey, that girl might be once in a lifetime as well. The truth is I don’t know whether I would pick either because I never confronted that specific situation but at least I know I thought about it and never regret.

p/s :: I hate mushrooms, they make me puke. I hate mushrooms. I hate, I hate, I hate mushrooms.

Screaming to the song “blind”,

hanjun

The Mangosteen Skyline

I got a surprise that could change my life forever. Things are going to change. I am just waiting for all reply before making a decision. Funny how things turned out to be for me. I am not saying the times I had was a waste, just pointing that after a difficult year, things are slowly turning better. Had to let go of some stuffs and let it be. Tomorrow is here. To think of myself so far away from home just bothers me. If I never had the chance to come back or return, please do know that I’m starting to miss you guys already. For all you know, I might not even return. Most of friends are there and I don’t think they will want to come back too. Maybe life will bring to other places in this world. For example, now it’s possible to fly from Australia straight to Honolulu. From next year onwards, holiday will have a new meaning.

I watched pushing daisies last week, I mean the whole season in 2 days. The part that was the prime issue was chuck wanted to hold ned’s hand but she cannot because she will die if they touch each other. Ned even hold her hand with a rubber glove and kiss her through a plastic bag. Throughout the movie, chuck held another man’s hand because she always wanted to hold someone’s hand. That made her think of moving on with someone else, someone she can hold, literally. I understand how she feels, that’s why I never blame her. It’s normal to feel that way, anyone would have done that. She was in a dilemma because it was ned who brought her back to life and she really likes him. Imagine you are with someone you love but cannot touch her or being with someone but not able to see her on a regular basis. It’s sad. No wonder long distance relationship cannot work out. In fact it sucks. On one hand, she likes you, another hand, she can also be with someone else that is physically present with her. Normally, things like this just suck. They just suck.

Last week, I was on my way to the curve, Damansara. On the way, I saw a proton gen-2 that looks like Ms. Marlina’s. Then, I thought, maybe it’s her because I know she lives in Damansara. Later, I went to Borders to find some books. Out of a sudden, a book called “Frost” caught my attention, I sat down and read the poem “the road not taken” by Robert Frost which was always taught by her in high school. Within minutes, my phone rang and guess what, it was Ms. Marlina. She wants me to help her son with some mandarin thing. I was freaked out. What are the odds of this kind of things happening? It was indeed a funny incident.

By the way, I read upon a poem that I would like to share. It’s written by Alexander Pushkin. A russian romantic poet that ended up dying after a duel with his wife’s alleged lover.

I loved you

I loved you, even now I may confess,
Some embers of my love, their fire retain;
But do not let it cause you more distress,
I do not want to sadden you again.

Hopeless and tongue-tied, yet I loved you dearly,
With pangs the jealous and the timid know;
So tenderly I loved you, so sincerely,
I pray God grant another love you so.

I told kathir about me opening a facebook account and the wonders that happened. He wasn’t that convinced and he wows to not open a facebook account. His reason was totally unlike mine at first. I used to hope I don’t open a facebook account because I see Mark Elliot Zuckerberg, a potential rival for me to be the youngest self made billionaire. Kathir’s reason was he wants to be the only surviving person on earth not to have a facebook account. That’s great, man. Kathir is leaving soon to sydney. I’m thinking of maybe joining him in our future career. My idea is to set up a chain restaurant like secret recipe. Their success is my idea of one day venturing into the same kind of business.

Akil is back. So is ‘how I met your mother’ and ‘big bang theory’. I am so psych. I’ve downloaded them and I watched. Ted proposed to Stella. She said ‘yes’. They are together now. As usual, sheldon and leonard is always being crazy, I would like to introduce you to watch this. My gosh, I was running through the university that akil’s studying right now, University of Melbourne, for civil engineering, it cost 29k AUSD. It’s too expensive for a student like me. There is no way I can enter such a prestigious school. Now, I still hope my dreams of continuing my post graduate in Imperial College London is still alive. Not sure my father still can afford that.

At that moment, when I saw the mangosteen skyline outside my window, I saw the your eyes at 35,000 feet above sea level. It feels like being on top of the world. At one moment, I was in the air looking towards to dying fire of the sun sinking into the far ocean of the horizon. I wish you were there with me but I know I’m the one who lost you because of my foolishness. I hope you were here to share all my happiness, sadness, joy and laughters. Those were the things that brought life to where it belongs. At least it held things together for a year or so. As my memory folds backwards, I realised we did a pretty good job. I miss times worrying about our telephone bills, worrying about both our academic results and most of all worrying about you. You’ll never know when you have to kiss me and smile for me.

the mangosteen skyline

p/s :: you’ll always be in my heart.

come fly with me,

tan han jun.